I did not go running today

And that does not mean that I am a failure.

I am trying to not beat myself up over this very small lapse in my training.

Let me backup a bit. I am currently using the Nike+ Marathon training program, which I am not in love with, and will probably switch to a different training program soon (any suggestions? I was thinking Hal Higdon?), and I have been diligent in following its recommended workouts. So I went on an 8 mile run on Saturday at home in Minnesota (the DBF and I went to visit my family for my cousin's wedding and Memorial Day Weekend). But I should have gone running again on Monday, a simple 4 miles. I did not go because we were traveling. I said I would go today. I did not go today because I wanted to sleep more. And I had a wonderful lunch with my friend Clare whom I haven't seen in over 12 years. Then it was hot. Then I was tired. And then it was too late...

This does not mean I'm a failure.

If I keep saying it, does it make it true??

Training in the summer in NYC is posing a few problems. They are:

1. It is HOT.

2. I don't like running on a treadmill.

So this leaves two options: waking up really early, or going really late.

Going really late is absolutely out of the question. DBF and my parents if they knew about it would absolutely say no. so early is my only option. I have to walk out my door to work somewhere around 8:15. There is a little wiggle room before or after, but 8:15 it is. So factoring in waking up, eating something small, allowing the body to do its morning digestion and expulsion, and figuring I run somewhere between a 9-10 minute mile (depending on the distance), it means waking up around 6 am.

This isn't awful. But it's not great. Add in a morning where I want to sign up for an EPA and it's almost undoable. (For those who don't know: EPA = Equity Principal Auditions, meaning a sign up is required in the morning, generally starting between 8:30-9am, but lines form as early as 6:30 or 7 depending on the popularity of the show. An early morning run is out of the question before an EPA, for the most part...)

I suppose I should learn how to "suck it up" about the treadmill, but the idea of running 8 miles on a treadmill bores me to tears just thinking about it. I can easily run 8 miles outdoors (okay, easily might be an overstatement), but on the treadmill just 1 mile feels like pulling teeth!

So sometimes I get "behind".

But this doesn't mean I'm a failure.

I swear this makes it true the more I say it.

It is easier for me too to get a workout done in the morning. Then I can't chicken out. I've always been more of a morning person than not. I need my sleep! Even in college it was better to go to sleep, wake up extremely early and start studying again, or finishing a paper at 5am after 4 hours of sleep... It's taken me almost 30 years to learn my own ticks, I should start using them to my advantage.

I am planning on waking up early tomorrow to go on a run before work. 4 miles, will be less than 40 minutes in and out. I can do it, I can do it. Hopefully tomorrow I can also figure out how to connect my Nike+ runs to my blog, so you guys can track my progress!

It's hard not to beat myself up when i don't do something "perfectly". But in retrospect, today was a really great day. Thanks to Clare, to my wonderful students on Tuesdays. This week we're meeting the trombone and trumpet, probably the two instruments I'm least comfortable with--nothing like trial by fire to get you over your fears!

Here's hoping I'm excited when the alarm goes off tomorrow!